Monday, August 29, 2011

Ok, so I'm still on the "doing it anyway" week, on my Brave Girl Journey; a class that I think shows the true colors of my black and white world. The premise of the class is to work on these big hairy issues that have basically held you by the neck and thrown your life into a Tizzy.  I'm behind, which is just fine, as I don't care too much about the time line, as I know these are big chunky monster-things that can't be tamed in just one week.  I actually didn't get it at first, then when I was taming my 13 year old daughters Freak-Out , I caught myself saying "ya know Georgie, it doesn't matter if I know the right thing to do is hard or embarrassing.  In your heart of hearts, if you believe it will be right...just do it AnYwaY!  I think I stopped in the midst of this teen age debacle and said a lil' hand-to mouth  "...oh!"
Sooo I started to think hard about this lesson, and decided to... you know what I'm gonna say,  (altogether now!)...Just Do it Anyway regarding my health issues.  I need to be healthy in order to fight these battles that I had to have with my 13 year old - over and over again.  The wish for me to be this incredible woman and mother only happens if I'm alive, so I'd better get over it.  The Universe complied with my wish, and after a torturous couple days at work,  I landed in the hospital with a mini-stroke. It's called a T.I.A or Transient Ischemic Attack, My blood disorder is all about keeping the protein levels low so my blood runs nice and thin, doing all that it's supposed to do.
When I drove myself to the hospital, it took every ounce of me to sit in my car, for one thing.  Having never met the creator of this class I'm taking, but seeing her face and hearing her little cheerleader voice on the videos, I just heard it blaring Just Do It Anyway in my ear, her voice, though loving and honest, was something that I didn't want to hear -like fingernails on a chalkboard, I've gotta tell you! Four hours later, the docs gathered that's what it was.  The beginning of Beet Juice, and leafy greens, the end of chocolate bars and lattes.  sigh.
I know, as somewhere up there, I am here for a reason, so I'm trying not to deal with the fact that my insurance did not cover this nice E.R visit.  I am just holding myself, hugging myself and knowing that my body took over when I, myself could not utter those Just Do It Anyway words. 

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